


after despair

by arctics (antarcticas)



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Forgiveness, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Ozai (Avatar) is an Asshole, Revenge, Zuko (Avatar)-centric, katara being a supportive partner
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-16 21:26:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29460498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antarcticas/pseuds/arctics
Summary: "So do I not face the past? Do I run away?"Sometimes you do not need toforgiveand forget.
Relationships: Katara/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 39
Collections: Zutara February Flash Fics





	after despair

**Author's Note:**

> day seven: revenge

"Do you think it's wrong?"

Katara leans up against Zuko in the car, placing her head on his shoulder as the taxi they're in zooms through the streets of the Caldera. She knows he's terribly nervous to meet his father again and that he doesn't know what to say (he finds that when he plans out what he wants to say he always malfunctions halfway through his monologues— she recalls the awkward speech he'd attempted to give her and the rest of their crew to convince them that he'd changed in college with a small smile). "What, particularly?"

"Seeking revenge," he frowns, "or wanting to ruin his life. I want to fuck him up like he fucked me up, and I know I shouldn't— I shouldn't want to hurt him— but I just . . . uh!" he makes sure that the driver can't hear him and then turns to her, forcing his face into the warm space between her shoulder and blouse. "I wish I could have gotten my stupid swords. I just want to make him hurt."

Katara rubs circles into his back. "You remember what happened with Yon Rha?"

He hiccups against her. "Of course."

"How did you feel about that?"

"I . . . don't know," she can feel him frowning. "I didn't think about him. I thought about you and what you wanted. More than that— what you needed."

"I love you, Zuko," she tells him then, quietly, almost like a secret though she knows it absolutely, absolutely isn't. "I love you so much. And I don't think anything you need is wrong."

"I don't think I should stab him open," he says sarcastically, and she chuckles, "but I understand."

"Right. Wanting revenge isn't wrong— but you have to think about why you want it, and if what you want to do will actually mean closure for you. Do you think you'd be happy slicing your father in two?"

Zuko winces. "Not under these circumstances, no. I don't think so. I think he deserves it but I can't imagine actually . . . I . . ."

"What?"

"This makes me a bad person," he whispers, hiding the words on the tip of his tongue. Katara buries her fingers in his hair. 

"You can tell me anything."

"I think there's a part of me," he says quietly, "a very small part of me, that wouldn't mind. Wouldn't mind if he died, certainly. Maybe not even if I killed him."

Katara double checks that the taxi driver can't hear him. "I can't tell you what you need to do, Zuko. I can't even tell you what the right thing is. I don't think forgiveness is always the right thing. I think some things are unforgivable."

"Oh."

"But it's not a binary," she continues, determinedly. "Some things are forgivable. No matter what you did, you were forgivable. You had good intentions. You are, fundamentally, a good person."

"How can you forgive me, after what I did, but I not forgive him?"

"Zuko? Are you . . . oh, no," Katara sighs as he shudders against her. She knows he's holding in anger, not tears. She knows how Zuko is. "Don't listen to Azula or those voices. You are not the same."

"I have everything. I'm going to inherit everything . . . and I have his blood. You forgave me and . . ."

"Your father is not the same. You and I have always been equals. Your father burnt you because you were defending lives. Please, Zuko. Please. You owe nobody revenge and nobody forgiveness. It's alright to just forget."

"So do I not face the past? Do I run away?"

"You're not running away from him. You've won and he's rotting. But we don't always need to see people to need closure. We don't need to open boxes. You don't have to think about this again. You only deserve forgiveness for yourself."

"Thank you," Zuko kisses the side of her head. Then he opens the sliding glass again. "Can you recalibrate our route? I decided I wanted to go to the mall."

"Instead of the prison?" the driver frowns. Zuko chuckles lowly. 

"What can I say? I'm hungry."

He rolls it back up as the GPS changes, and Katara places her head at his warm shoulder, through his red long-sleeve. She simply hums. 

"Thank you," he says.


End file.
